Arg.

Let me preface this blog entry with this statement. I am not gay, none of my immediate family members are gay, and none of my close friends are gay.

I wish that people could stop yelling about gay marriage. This isn't a question of politics, morals or people who want to yell a lot. I do not understand why any American would disapprove of this. For those that do I have some questions for you. Why does this matter to you? What is this to you? How does this change what 'marriage' is?

I keep on hearing right winged people talk about how allowing this "redefines" marriage opens the door to some sort of slippery slope with respect to marriage. I do not understand why people would make such arguments. If America did not redefine marriage it would still be illegal in sixteen states for interracial marriages to take place. It was like that until 1967... It would still be illegal in some states for black people to marry other black people because they would be still considered property. Property... Furthermore with respect to a "slippery slope" argument what people fail to understand is that the legislature is the gate keeper. It is as absurd to believe for a second that polygamy or some form of sexual abuse would ever come into play with respect to the legalization of marriage.

I do not understand why this occurs. America has defined itself as the vanguard of Democracy. The Constitution was written in such a matter to be interpreted and to change when needed. The founding fathers' based their writings on the works of Thomas Hobbes, and John Locke. Where "Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of happiness" is paramount.

I do not understand why an uncountable section of the population of this country are not given the same rights as others simply because of who they choose to love. They are not trying to take anything from you, they are not asking you to like what they choose to embrace. All these people want is the chance to have this semantical title of 'husband' or 'wife'

Forget the politics behind this. Forget about the religious connotations that you may have about marriage. Forget about being forced to support something that you may not believe in. Why not give them the opportunity to have that chance? Why not on a base level just embrace them as human beings who want and need love?

But for the last time
You're everything that I want and ask for
You're all that I'd dreamed
Who wouldn't be the one you love
Who wouldn't stand inside your love

Life goes on.

This is a story that starts off on a whim. It's been three years since I have done any volunteer work of substance. Although I helped train a member of the Special Olympics last year, it really wasn't anything of any great substance. So when John asked who wanted to go to Flint, MI to meet do a service project I jumped at the chance. We left Minnesota at 4:30 in the morning. We drove straight through to Flint arriving at 7 pm. We had to wait two hours for the guys from VT to arrive. It was good to meet six other men from across the country who share our desire to help the less fortunate. We told Tim the guy from VT who was coordinating the entire project that we wanted to be outside. He assigned a team of five of us to go to the shelter. Upon arriving we met Gary. The shelter was the size of a small house and he informed us that sixty five people call sleep there every night. Our project for the day was to expand their garden and move the grass to an area where they wanted to create a playground for the children. We spent the next six hours moving the lawn for them by hand.

It's hard to describe the poverty level in Flint, Mi to other college kids in Central Minnesota. Most of them have no idea what it's like to go without, or to have to live in a condemned structure. Even after spending three months in the lower 9th ward in New Orleans it was a shock to come back to a place where I didn't have to sleep in a room with fifty other people. The concept of privacy had become foreign to me and I was used to dealing with a crisis everyday. It never occurred to me though that people would live in those kinds of conditions without some disaster. In Flint we saw homes that should have been condemned. Houses boarded up and other properties that used a tarp as s roof... Previously I hadn't thought of people living int hose kinds of conditions outside of some form of disaster area. I didn't believe that the standard of living had that much disparity in America. Let alone from Minnesota to MI. I know that now, and that's pretty special to me.

On another note that's special men from three different states came together to work on various projects. The only thing that tied us together at the start of the day was three letters and the guiding principals behind the fraternity that each of us are a part of.

I wish that I cold do more, in the future I will.


J

bittersweet.

Because I am pressed for time this blog will be in list form.

Thing that irk me:

Women that are less than intelligent
People who has no sense of propriety
women in general
That it is the end of March and it is snowing



Fin

We find ourselves in the same old mess singing drunken lullabies

I should have learned by now that whenever Tyler says let's tear shit up tonight it's going to be bad news bears for someone. Last night we certainly took more out of alcohol then alcohol could ever dream to take out of us. The night started innocently enough with Tyler and his wife showing up and asking us to all head downtown. In true college men fashion we got ready and the crew hit the first bar. The bar was packed, the beer was cheap and my glass wasn't empty while we were there. I talked to him about life after college, and what it's like to have a big boy job.

We left the first bar and headed to Mc's. I have to say one of the most amazing things when you’re inebriated is a free Taco bar. It attracts everyone, and anyone. We had previously talked about having one of the lovely buffalo libations that they serve up. Upon our arrival I ordered two pitches of beer for our table. Tyler returned with an 'Irish' buffalo. He took one sip and made a face like he just fucked a cat. He offered it to me, and being the brave soul that I am I accepted. Now there are certain rules when one drinks any type of buffalo. The first and foremost unless you want to get all kinds of crazy drunk do not chug them, however considering they have six shots of alcohol in them unless you like the taste of them you should finish it in relatively short order. Me wanting to have as much fun as possible that night said get ready for the 'diesel' and slammed the drink in roughly 8 seconds. Cheers and high fives abound, followed up with looks of disbelief from my counterparts. I continue to drink beer and it is lovely.

We leave Mc's after another round of buffalo's. This time I enjoyed mine like a responsible alkie. After heading outside of the bar some random drunkasaures rex comes up to us. The kid has to be one of the most awkward white guys ever so of course Tyler and I have to run our mouths at him. Some of the highlights include:

"holy shit I didn't know they let mental patients drink.... How does it feel to be a part of a family of brother/cousins?" The drunk guy doesn't take to well to our mocking of us, he gets up in Tylers grill. Tyler says 'motherfucker you've got five seconds to get the fuck out of my face before I fuck your world up.' The white guy decides to push me. I go with it, and fall. Tyler grabs him by the throat and throws him down. The awkward white guy goes back to his crew and starts pointing at us. The rest of our crew has assembled, someone calls the police.

The cops arrive, and I ask them if they're here about the assault that just occurred. They inform me that they were not aware of an assault; I inform the officers that the drunk kid assaulted me. One police officer breaks off and separates the drunk guy who is too out of control to do anything. I don’t know if anyone else has this ability but unless I’m black out drunk I have the ability to form coherent sentences and equate myself eloquently. (You may believe or not believe this, but after starting drinking at eleven I’ve developed quite a tolerance.) The officer asks me if I would like to place him under citizen’s arrest, and I ask him about the burden of proof because what he has thus far is hearsay. The officer looks at me a bit puzzled I inform him that I am a pre-law major. He understands, and informs me that if I issue a statement it will be good enough. First I get to fill out some paperwork, which I finish in short order. I then speak into a recording device. The drunk kid is handcuffed and thrown into the back of the car.
Half of our crew goes to get food the other half goes to another bar. I split the difference and head back to the house. On my way back to the house, I slip and fall hitting my head on the concrete. I brush it off until I try to get up and everything is spinning. It takes me at thirty seconds or so to get my bearings and continue home. Upon arriving I head for my room and pop tow vicodin.
I’ve got to say that being drunk and on vicodin is bad news bears. However being buzzed and on vicodin is amazing. Everything slows down moderately and things are pretty chill. I hop on my facebook and see that a virgin that I’ve been trying to get with for sometime is online. I send her an IM innocently enough. She should know better, but what can I say; shit happens.
Some of the highlights include her asking how many women I’ve slept with, and me informing her that it’s okay when someone goes down on her. I invite her over to my place only to find out she’s not in town. We make plans to hook up next weekend, I’ll be shocked and appalled if she remains the only 21 year old virgin that I know after we hangout.

Today the baseball gods smiled upon thee

Today the AP reports that Boof Bonser is expected to miss the season after it was revealed that he has a partial tear in his rotator cuff and labrum. In 2007 Bonser through 30 games went 8-12. He gave up 98 runs, 27 HRs, with an ERA of 5.10 In the 08 campaign Bonser went 3-7 with 78 runs, and 16 Hrs, and an ERA of 5.93. I couldn't be happier that he will not join the twins in the 09 campaign.

In my opinion Bonser just sucks. My friends and I have a tradition of consuming a disporportionate amount of alcohol whenever he enters a game because we forebode that it will soon go south. I hope that this will be the driving force that makes either the twins sign anothr reliever in his position, or allows other players to come up through the farm system.

The blue note

It's been over a month since I've updated. There's too much of life in a month to condense down to one blog entry so I'll leave you with a story. One of my brothers moonlights as a bartender in a town called Winstead. I show up about an hour into his shift, plant myself at the end of the bar and order a pitcher. After my first beer I take a look around and the bar is a mix of old men and rednecks. I find out the guy next to me is name George. My pitcher is empty he orders a new one and offers me some. I agree and thus begins a five hour long drunken convesation. We talk about the military, how shitty the economy is, cars. etc al. After three hours and seven pitchers between the two of us I am properly inebriated. Not J drunk yet, but I'm getting there. I order a Jack and Coke and get up to take a leak. Some hick was standing infront of my stool when I got back. and he asked me 'hey slant eye, how long have you been gay?' My first response was to laugh my ass of at him and then rip him a new one about being a stupid hick. I then proceeded to bring my brother into it and I asked him hey man tell this fuckhead how many women I've fucked. He obliged and said more than that dickhead will ever see. The hick walked away and said fuck you. I responded with not even if you let me videotape it. This would not be the last encounter that I had with the redneck that thought I was gay. I finish my jack and coke, and order another.

Twenty minutes later and half a pitcher in, the redneck returns. He starts running his mouth about how he wants to go outside with me. I responde by telling him that I will not hold his hands while he crosses the street. I suggest that he goes back to his crew of friends so that they can start their circle jerk while he's on his knees. The redneck asks me again if I want to go outside. I then launch into a tirade against him it went something like this:

me: Listen you dumb fuck, I'm going outside with you.
redneck: why not?
me: Because I don't want to go to jail shithead
redneck: are you going to call the cops?
me: god you're fucking stupid. If we fight outside of a bar legally they have to call the cops.
redneck: come outside with me
me: fuck you're stupid.

at this point the redneck went outside to smoke. Geroge followed him. I looked at punch and said you know my balls say to go out there and beat the shit out of that guy, but my brain says to stay put. what should I do? Punch told me to stay where I was, he walked out from behind the bar and headed outside. The redneck was not allowed back into the bar.

J

want to see a real shit show?

Members of the opposite sex perplex me. I met a woman last semester. She seemed to be interesting enough as far as her having a similar sense of human and somewhat of an understanding as to the type of person that I am. We started talking one day and for a two week stretch we talked everyday at length. At the end of which the subject of drinking came up and I told her that I intended to go to the bar on Thursday night. By the time I arrived at the bar she was already drunk. We had one drink together and then she wandered off, we exchanged more texts and met up an hour later at another bar. She said that she needed to tell me that her life was a mess, and that she wasn't looking for a boyfriend. She also added that I was too smart to be her boyfriend. I proceeded to tell her in the nicest way possible and by that I mean not tell her the complete truth that I don't do the relationship thing. (It's not that I don't do it, it's that unless you meet my standards I'm not going to waste my time.) She acknowledged this and then proceeded to tell me that she thinks that I'm super cool and that she wants to be friends because she likes me and that I'm funny. So confused by her logic I tell her no worries, we have another drink together and then she says that she's leaving. I tell her to call me/text me when she gets home so that I know she arrived safely. When she does text me she says that she's mad at me because I didn't feel up on her... To which I reply that I don't do that sort of thing with people that I'm not interested in. The rest of the night was a mixed bag of consuming copious amounts of alcohol and getting my kind of drunk. The kind of drunk when you pass out in your bed naked and you put off going to the bathroom until the last moment possible because moving is awkward. The kind of drunk where you wake up drink water and sleep for several hours more. The day after a hard night of drinking like that always leaves me feeling less than human the next day. I don't enjoy the feeling but I do enjoy telling people that I feel almost human again in the evening. Anyway crazy drunk girl sends me a message apologizing for the way that she acted the previous night. Saying that she was sorry that she was that girl. She reiterated the fact that she thought that I was a cool person and wanted to be my friend, and apologized for her being upset that I wouldn't touch her.

Granted I understand when people are drunk they say and do some stupid things, but really? The triumvirate of stupidity in her case in my mind was first telling me that she thought that I was too smart for her. Followed by her assertions that she wasn't looking for a boyfriend, and finally that she wanted me to get all over her? What is that? Look I can understand being drunk and wanting to be touched and or hook up, but the person that you're trying to seduce will feel a lot less repugnant about the entire experience if you don't tell them that you aren't looking for anything serious.